LAURA 2006

Mixed-media on paper 65/50 cm 2007

[Via http://pieterzandvliet.wordpress.com]

Got any with DILF?

Beer
333 Cans
Tiger Cans
Heineken Cans
Saigon Bottle
Pepsi Cans
7 Up Cans
Mirinda Cans
Black Coffee
Ice Coffee With Milf
Lemon Juice
Small Mineral Water
Big Mineral Water

As long as she doesn’t look like this (Via FailBlog)

Submitted by: framished via Engrish Funny Submissions

[Via http://engrishfunny.com]

Muchii Muchi to ha Zai by Kemonono

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National government and the Ampatuans have explaining to do

Before we all get lost in the shuffle of the Maguindanao martial law controversy, it is best to see what is inside the ‘forest’ rather than wasting out time debating whether or not proclamation 1959 was constitutional. It is a dead horse now. There is no use cerebrally beating it further.

What am simply saying is that while we seem to be all engrossed in looking at the ‘forest,’ that is Maguindanao under the ‘canopy’ of martial law, we might as well be more productive and deal with the more urgent problem of knowing how to fast-track the hideous events that happened in Maguindanao that has caught the attention of the whole world and get it over with, with fair and justifiable resolutions.

Let us get the wheels of justice moving at a steady and unrelenting pace so that in record time, the people responsible for the atrocious crime will start paying for it behind bars and meaningful justice will be received by the victim’s families. This way we can all move forward and let this be history not to be forgotten.

Meanwhile, government and the Ampatuans must start enlightening the people about the cache of munitions found in the hands of this notorious and murderous clan, especially those thousands of assault rifles and several .50 caliber heavy machine guns found buried near their residences, not to mention the 500,000 bullets for various calibers.

For the government, somebody has to answer how weapons and ammunitions that bore military and police markings and said to be sufficient to arm a battalion got into the private arsenal of the Ampatuans?

Who ordered the donation, if indeed it was a donation, of this military hardware and for what reason? Or were this weaponry clandestinely sold to the Ampatuans only to be used against the civilian population?

Were these government owned armaments given to the Ampatuans to help the government neutralize the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) or was it given as a payback to the tremendous effort by the Ampatuans, as it is alleged, to galvanize President Arroyo stay in power during the election of 2004 and 2007?

Or could there be any other reason for the apparition of these weapons at the hand of the Ampatuans?

For the Ampatuans, there is nothing more significant to the whole nation and the Filipinos than for them to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Who, from the government, issued the armaments to them?

Since when has this weaponry been turned over to them?

Was there a pay-off? Who got the money?

Are there private individuals colluding with government in the sale of the weaponry?

Are there more weapons hidden coming from government that authorities haven’t located yet?

Unless we know the answers to all these questions, we will never find out the mode of transfer and the people behind these deplorable dealings.

It is even, perhaps, safe to assume that political warlords all over the country, especially those in Mindanao, are enjoying the benefit of governments ‘deadly token’ of appreciation for an election job well done.

Let not the horrific events in Maguindanao be ever repeated.

[Via http://quierosaber.wordpress.com]

Tantsnusk, tantslem och fula tanter

Jag minns när min morfar var ledsen en gång. Han brukade alltid plocka smultron och hallon på somrarna, vilket det är skamlöst gott om i Södermanland. Han hade som vana att på vägen hem bjuda barn på bären ifall han stötte på några. Någon gång på 90-talet höjdes dock beredskapen för pedofiler framförallt efter de bestialiska härvorna i Belgien. Och en vacker sommardag när morfar skulle bjuda några barn på smultron blev de vettskrämda och sprang så fort de kunde därifrån. Min morfar uppfattades som en ful gubbe, som barn sedan 90-talet lärt sig att akta sig för. (På 80-talet när jag växte upp hade vi gott om fula gubbar som ingen gjorde något åt men också var rätt ofarliga när allt kom omkring).

Idag är vi vana vid fula gubbar. Inte bara de malignt fula gubbarna, utan även gubbsnusk som klär av yngre tjejer och kvinnor med ögonen. Låter en hand smeka en oförsiktig stjärt på tunnelbanan. Som glider fram med glänsande panna och intensiva ögon och vill bjuda på drinkar till “lilla fröken”. Visst är det ute att vara äldre man på jakt efter yngre kvinna? Det finns få figurer som fått ta mer stryk på senare år, som är mer ute. “Jag hatar dig ditt äckliga jävla gubbslem” heter det som bekant. Ja, äldre män och yngre kvinnor är inte en darling i popkulturen just nu.

Däremot har begrepp som toyboys, MILFs och cougars blivit hetare och hetare. I nya serien “Cougar town” spelar Courtney Cox en kvinna vars äktenskap gått i kras och nu vill återuppleva de ungdomsår hon aldrig hade på grund av ett barn hon fick tidigt. Hon följer med mer vana cougars ut på klubbar för att hitta yngre killar. Hon finner rätt fort en fuckbuddy/toyboy som är kanske hälften så gammal. Stämningen i serien är uppsluppen och åldersskillnaden framställs som afrodisiaka mer än som något problematiskt (även om Courtney Cox visar upp skamveck, bilringar och rynkor på ett sätt som är mycket ovanligt i hollywood).

Tidigare i år sändes även “The Cougar” som är en populär reality show där tjugo unga män (runt 20 år) tävlar om den framgångsrika fastighetsmäklaren Stacey Anderson som är skild med fyra barn (se även avsnittet om “MILF island” i tv-serien “30 Rock”). Upplägget var detsamma som i The Bachelorette. Och jag börjar undra vilken som är den primära målgruppen för den här typen av serier? Är det äldre kvinnor som vill ha glada ungtuppar med synliga magrutor, slät hy och otvivelaktiga erektioner? Eller är det yngre män som efter idoga nattfantasier om lärarinnor och kompisars mammor efterfrågar mer mer mer?

En fejkad serie ur tv-serien "30 Rock"

Det är kanske rätt så oskyldigt. Och jämställdhetsaspekten får man aldrig glömma (amen!). Men ändå, är det verkligen alldeles särskilt fantastiskt med äldre kvinnor som tar sig yngre älskare?

En nära vän till mig är mycket snygg och stilig på alla sätt. När man är ute med honom kommer det alltid fram tjejer och vill visa sina MTV-moves.  Flertalet gånger har jag även varit med om att äldre kvinnor gått fram och börjat ta för sig lite på honom och viska sexuella inviter med Clint Eastwood-röst. Till hans stora obehag. När han provar kläder råkar butikskvinnorna ofta öppna skynket för att se hur “kläderna” sitter.

Själv arbetade jag länge som telefonförsäljare och hade egentligen bara en enda riktigt stor kundgrupp. Kvinnor mellan 30-50 år som alltid verkade minst lika intresserade av hur jag såg ut, hur lång jag var och om jag tränade som av tvättmedlet Afrodite. Inte mig emot, man säljer bäst genom att etablera sig i vänkretser och deras väninnor visste ofta vem jag var redan innan jag hann ringa dem.

Demi Moore gifter sig med 16 år yngre Ashton Kutcher. Madonna dejtar 22-åring. I tv-serie efter tv-serie tar sig kvinnor yngre älskare. Det är inte något problem i sig men reaktioner har väldigt mycket ett drag av revanchism över sig. Och vi förväntas inte bara notera det utan även aktivt stödja och vurma för det. Och triumfatoriska skribenter skriver att Ulf Lundell kan slänga sig i väggen för nu är det kvinnornas tur minnsann!

Meanwhile på playan i Brasilien, i Gambia och på Jamaica lägger just en blekfet vit västerländsk kvinna sin hand på en alldeles för ung mans lår. Hon kommer köpa honom en gåva för de sexuella tjänster han utför för henne. Hon kommer köpa honom kläder för de komplimanger han lyckas få att låta äkta. Har hon inte förtjänat att få känna sig åtrådd? Hon som alltid jobbat och slitit. Har inte hon förtjänat njutning med en vacker ung man som säger att hon ser ut som Madonna? Kvinnors sexturism till framförallt Sydamerika och Västafrika har samtidigt med cougar/milf-fenomenet blivit mer uppmärksammat även det troligen är hyfsat orelaterat. Kanske allra bäst i filmen “Mot södern” där en 55-årig vit fransyska inleder en relation med en 18-årig haitier (men även i reportage som här och här). Det som är slående med kvinnors sexturism är att de flesta själva inte klarar av att erkänna för sig själva eller andra vad de håller på med. De vet att det inte är helt normalt kanske, men vill inte kalla det för sexköp. De väljer att förtränga maktassymetrin som präglar deras “relationer” med de strandraggande ynglingarna kanske just för att de är kvinnor och ser det hela som ett bejakande av deras sexualitet.

Från "Mot Södern"

Självklart anknyter det bara delvis till ämnet toyboys och cougars. Det finns självklart många fler män som köper sex än kvinnor, och fler män som sexturistar i Sydostasien än kvinnor i Västafrika. Stötestenen är hur vi som samhälle förväntas reagera på äldre kvinnor som kladdar på unga män och rika madamer som köper “negergossar” i kolonialländerna. Kvinnlig sexturism är kanske lite pinsamt på sin höjd. Äldre kvinnor med yngre män är Samantha i Sex and the city och more power to her! Var tog makt-aspekten vägen? Är det verkligen alldeles okej med en relation mellan en 20-åring och en 40-åring? Risken att bli utnyttjad är mycket stor för den yngre som saknar både erfarenhet, ställning eller skinn på näsan. Och det är inte vackrare för att gamlingen är kvinna istället för man. Det är inte särskilt pittoreskt när någon med ett mäktigt kontaktnät känner sig försmådd och den unga älskaren/älskarinnan står där och känner sig rädd och förpliktigad. Stiligheten och Odjuret.

Nu har jag låtit som en ålders-moralist. Age ain’t nothing but a number och allt det där gäller trots allt. För visst finns det ju relationer med åldersskillnad som funkar bra, även korta sexuella sådana. Frågan jag inte funnit svar på är om the cougar är en manlig eller kvinnlig fantasi? Och om det verkligen sker så ofta som man nuförtiden får intrycket av.

Men sluta dalta med tantsnusk! En omoralisk kvinna är omoralisk trots att hon är kvinna. Och det finns inget försonande med tantslemmet som gnider sig över stränderna runtom i världen. Inte heller är det mer okej att utnyttja unga män än vad det är att utnyttja unga kvinnor. Men visst är det nog rätt kul för många att ha sex med äldre kvinnor och äldre män, och sedan i äldre år har man sex med yngre män och yngre kvinnor. Så är cirkeln sluten.

Länkar

Dags för kvinnorna att vara gubbsjuka http://www.expressen.se/1.1665651 

och http://isabellestahl.wordpress.com/2009/08/09/kvinnan-ar-den-nya-mannen/

Cougar Town http://www.expressen.se/noje/1.1352094/courteney-cox-i-tv-komedi

Cheating in My Dreams

Last night I dreamt I was kissing this attractive well built young guy. I’m sounding like a real MILF when I refer to someone in their mid twenties as young. He began rubbing me and eventually I succumbed to his advances. Other than him being well endowed, I do not remember too much about our physical action, but I do know I was disappointed that we did not meet up again.

My sister and I had been talking about sexual choices we made when we were younger that night and I am not proud to admit how I used my body, or rather let my body be used for ulterior reasons, mostly for attention and feeling included. Who knew not being popular in middle school could have so many ramifications later on in life?
Sex was always the big thing. It was okay to get completely naked with someone and do everything but sex because there was still something left “to do”, a reason for the guy to come back. And as one friend said, once you sleep with someone you have to add him to your list, even if you did not want to because otherwise what was the point of a list.

We did not sleep together in my dream, me and that young stud who showed know signs of developing the inevitable gut. He didn’t want to because it meant something more. In Pretty Woman Julia Roberts would not kiss her johns on the mouth because that was too intimate, as if giving someone a BJ while he is driving the car is not.

perhaps these sexual dreams are a mere outlet for my desires and fantasies, none of which I’m eager to act upon, but still tantalize and empower me.

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What do you get for completing your mission, besides the sex part? YouGet paid! Uh huh, thats right, up to $1,000.00 for your raunchy little homemade sex tape. Too bad you’ll have to hand over all the sex tape money for that stupid gucci handbag you can’t afford to buy her.

   

The See My Wife website has all kinds of hot amateur housweife sex action. So, if you can’t convince your wife to go along with the plan, watch your neighbors wife!

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Milf Next Door At It's Best

Milf Next Door At It’s Best

We spent a whole day at the office complex trying to find a milfand we were ready to give up until we saw jasmine. she was coming down the skyway in thisamazing business suit that was showing off her cleavage. you could even see a little of thered bra that was holding back those tasty melons. she was on the way to get some lunchwhen we came along.…Join here!

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Army rings troops around suspected Lanao del Norte hideaway of abducted priest

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Cory Chase Cums

Jerky Wives star Cory Chase paid us a visit and man is this one hot housewife. Cory wants to ride the Sybian and we are more than happy to oblige. Her seductive smile as she strips for the camera is almost too hot to handle. then she slides her bare pussy down the shaft of the sybian and the ride begins. Cory is wracked with spasms quickly as the sybian strokes her g-spot. There alot of hot orgasms in this segment plus you get to see just how wet her tight pussy gets. Check out part 1 today.

Top 28 Adult Sites All On One Site!

Top 28 Adult Sites All On One Site!

While out and about on the road I happened to bump into Ariella who was on the side of the road stranded. Her car was having problems and couldnt get started. Did I mention that Ariella had some humongous tits the type you can use as a pillow. Enough said, I immediately offered her a ride and some cash to help her out of this little situation she was in. But you know there was catch and catch her I did. Right back to my place to play with those big beautiful breasts of hers. This may have been the most expensive blowjob ever but I would have to say its worth every penny. Enjoy! Click here!

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carolyn reese .........we'll take 2 please

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Photos of Sexy Halle Berry

Hot Mamma

Perhaps the Loveliest MILF alive

Bing Berry

Dreams of Stone Angels

Cyber Rainbow

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Butts An Any Way You Like It Porn

A group of girls who came together for pure love of oversized shafts. These chicks seek out the most well hung human hot dog oversized beef poles known on the planet and film the most extreme cock filled videos you’ve ever seen. Just wait till you see johnsons sized 10-25 inches gettin jiggy with tight pussies. Tons of videos and pics. Join here!

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Vera Vision—After-School Special, Pt. 2

You know how someone does something but then seconds later, they began to think it wasn’t such a good idea? Jaime was definitely there.

Looking around at the closed VIP room, Jaime really started to wonder if he crossed a line that had no business crossing. Ms. Kendrick had no idea it was him even though her face was instantly recognizable. Now, he was sitting in a chair with his hands firmly tied behind his back. The club had a strict no touching rule but they also wanted to be sure there was no way a patron would even entertain the thought of copping a feel. Jaime instantly felt like a dumb ass. At least he paid for the dance in advance.

He didn’t believe in coincidences too much. He thought it was just a way of justifying something that was meant to happen. But he was starting to get a little unnerved that “Scandalous” happened to play in the overhead speakers as Ms. Kendrick entered the room. She was wearing black thigh-high boots with a 5-inch heel, a low cut top that barely covered her C-cup tits and boy shorts that appeared to be a size too small for her ass. Her belly piercing slightly dangled from her navel with every move she made, almost whispering to Jaime to play with it with his teeth. He went from participating in a nice game of mind-playing with his teacher to her seducing him without trying. What the fuck has he gotten himself into?

Jaime was starting to feel a little guilty. Ms. Kendrick had no idea it was him and he was taking full advantage of that fact. But it was too late. He was trapped and couldn’t escape even if you wanted to. Be careful for what you wish for…you’ll just might get it.

“Are you ready?” Ms. Kendrick asked as she got ready for her private performance.

To be honest, Jamie was anything but ready. He was actually scared shitless. “Ye…ye…yeah…” he stammered.

“Good,” Ms. Kendrick replied. She turned around and smiled softly. She walked over to him and gently kissed his lips, assuring him that everything was going to be okay. But each time he tried to open his mouth to give up the charade, his loins would be set ablaze on her movements. She smelled like a vanilla musk lightly touched with jasmine. Her aura was dripping with sex and it was obvious Ms. Kendrick was no rookie or amateur. She knew exactly what the fuck she was doing. Maybe Jaime didn’t feel so guilty after all.

“Let’s begin,” she smiled again. She leaned forward on Jaime, pressing her breasts against his chest. She cooed in his ear, playfully biting it as her hands caressed his chest. She then turned around and bent over and showed her perfectly round ass to Jaime. He could definitely see why some guys referred to a female’s ass using all sorts of euphemisms. It was an apple, a biscuit, and a romp-shaker. It made Jaime wonder what Ms. Kendrick was doing hiding all of that ass underneath her clothes.

But her ass was just an appetizer to the dual main course meals. She stripped off her top and her breasts bounced out of it. They were perfect. Tear-shaped and lickable as he would later describe to his boys. They were succulent and dying to be played, licked, and sucked. Jaime felt his mouth water just looking at them. However, the best was yet to come. Ms. Kendrick pulled off her boy shorts and revealed her waxed snatch. Cinnamon-colored, smooth, and slick with her own juices and sweat, it was obvious Ms. Kendrick hadn’t been with many partners and took very good care of herself. That made Jaime’s cock bounce in his pants.

She climbed on top of him and began to grind her pussy against the bulge of his pants. Because Jaime was restricted to keep his hands to himself, he was tortured by not being able to do anything. She was an expert at riding cock and he only imagined how she was in bed. She began to ride him faster, softly moaning with each grind. Jaime no longer could play the actor and began grunting against her. He wanted to fuck her so bad and couldn’t. The torture was worse than any after-school detention.

Just when he couldn’t take it anymore, Jaime shot off in his pants. He came hard and quick, leaving him panting and sweating. Ms. Kendrick stopped riding him and smiled as Jaime regained his composure. She softly kissed his forehead and patted his face with her hands. She then got up and gathered her clothing. She undid the tie behind his back and massaged Jaime’s wrists. But before she could leave, there was one last piece of business Ms. Kendrick had to go over with Jaime to make sure it was an evening he would never forget.

“Just to remind you,” she whispered in his ear, “homework is still due on Monday.”

*Above model is Jessica Drue; photography is by RobG Photography*

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Mollys webcam show had a hot visitor the other day. The lovely Adrianna Milano came through to show Mollys pussy some much deserved attention. The cam was on and the internet got to witness the pussy licking session of the year. Amazing stuff went down. Not content with just tasting Molly,though, Adrianna broke out the big pink strap on and went to town on Molly. This was a hot one people.  Join here!

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The talk

Datorită unei perioade foarte neprielnice blogărelii pentru Mitru, el resuscitat spontan de muze şi de suma tuturor lucrurilor plăcute născocite de mintea mai mult sau mai puţin bolnavă  a lui se decide să îşi recâştige  drepturile asupra blogului său. Cele ce urmează sunt o punere în scenă ceva mai dramatică a conversaţiei celor doi.

Mitru: Salut…

Blog: Salut? Salut? Asta e tot ce poţi spune după 3 luni de absenţă?? Salut?

M: Păi…da?

B: Ştii cât de greu mi-a fost toata vara asta?

M:Umm…nu.

B: E teribil să ai zilnic doar 5-6 vizitatori şi ce e mai rău că pentru aştia 5-6 câţi or fi nu am nimic nou ce să le spun sau să le arat sau cu ce să le distrag atenţia cât de cât!

M: M-am gândit la tine, să ştii.

B: Aha….sunt convins, am auzi că ai fost pe alte bloguri, le faci lor vizite (de curtoazie) şi pe mine mă laşi de izbelişte!

M: Vroiam să experimentez şi eu puţin. Mă poţi condamna, dacă vreau să învâţ să am grijă de tine mai bine şi să învăţ cum se scrie mai bine tragând cu ochiul/urechea/cursorul spre alte bloguri?

B: Asta tot nu justifică absenţa ta totală.

M: Decât să fac o treabă de că**t mai bine nu o fac. Vreau să scriu zilnic şi să ma ocup de tine după cele învăţate în vara asta.

B:…

M: Vrei să o luăm de la capăt?

B:Da..

M: Atât! (Face un flip şi explodează spontan intr-o mare de curcubee şi iepuraşi)

Apoteotic final eh?

It's Back! Crazy Sex Porn Spoof Nut Busters.

It’s Back! Crazy Sex Porn Spoof Nut Busters.

Our detectives go deep undercover in this explosive, sex packed Miami Spice Episode. When detective Chubbs and Cockit are asked to investigate Faulderon, a dangerous drug lord who just came into town looking action, they find themselves pulled into the lethal world of drugs, money, and women. Our undercover girl Tina was willing to go all the way in order to earn trust with Faulderon, and that means let him fuck her brains out. Dont miss a single minute of this amazing episode of Miami Spice.  Join here!

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Vera Vision—After-School Special, Pt.1

It’s a scenario that has been played out in the media before: high-school student falls in love with a teacher and an illicit love affair begins. They would get caught, the teacher goes to jail, and all is forgotten later. Jaime never figured out how in the hell anyone could look at their teacher even remotely sexual. That is, until he met Ms. Kendrick. She was a young, History teacher who always seemed more passionate about studying the Cold War than she was about any pop culture events. Although it seemed she was aloof at times, Ms. Kendrick simply didn’t care enough about Perez Hilton and the like to give a damn.

Still, pop culture references aside, there was a secret about Ms. Kendrick that many—her colleagues included—have wondered about her. She drove a Mercedes that was splashed with candy-apple paint. She carried the designer label on her arms and always seemed to look she was worth well more than she was getting paid for. Everyone knew teachers didn’t get paid nearly their worth. Many teachers picked up second jobs and severely cut back their lifestyles just to make sure the lights stayed on. But Ms. Kendrick never really had that problem. Many assumed she came from a rich family or had a wealthy sugar daddy supporting her. If only it was that simple. Ms. Kendrick was hiding a well-kept secret from everyone, her students especially. She was a stripper. It was by accident that Jaime found out and it was a night he would never forget.

One night Jaime and his friends decided to hit The Lovely Kitten Gentleman’s Club for an evening of relaxation. What says relaxing better than having a stripper shaking her ass in your face? Ordering just soft drinks at the bar, the men sat at the front table to enjoy themselves. Every dancer brought something different to the table. Some of them were acrobatic flexible. Some of them were the bump n’ grind type of dancers. Some of them used their eyes to seduce. Nevertheless, all of the dancers were great. Until one particular dancer came on stage and Jaime thought he was going to fall out of his chair.

Her hair was a black bob cut. Her breasts were perfect due to a little knife sculpting. Her toned body was the result of many workouts at the local gym. But it was her face that really garnered the most attention. She had innocence about her, although her place of work and attire told otherwise. But it wasn’t just the look on her face that captured Jaime’s attention. He recognized her. It was pretty damn impossible to not realize who she was but she was one of those types who had a recognizable face no matter where she went or what she had on. It was Ms. Kendrick.

Wearing a black corset, fishnet stockings and five-inch stripper heels, Jaime found his mouth gasped open in shock. It was no question where she was getting her extra income. He didn’t know how long she was stripping but imagined it had been for a while based on her lifestyle. Now she was bumping and grinding in his face. She had a dancer’s rhythm, naturally moving her body to every beat and melody. It wasn’t contrived or practiced. She cupped her firm breasts and licked her lips, practically begging the patrons to spend just a few more dollars on her. When she did the splits on the floor and bounced her ass, Jaime felt his head nodding along with her.

His next move would be spoken about for many years to come. The end result would become the all-time greatest dinner story. Jaime was going to pay for Ms. Kendrick to give him a lap dance. Ms. Kendrick’s reaction to Jaime’s generosity would be classic.

*Above model is Jessica Drue; photography is by piratephotography*

Top 10 Hottest Porn Stars #10 Ricki White

Top 10 Hottest Porn Stars #10 Ricki White

She just attended a Tea Party on Tax day and some Obama supporter referred her to some German dude for a job. She arrives late talking about the party and how she loves a good fuck coz its so recession proof. However she’s tested on her tea servicing ability but little does she know she has signed u … Join here!

Ricki White Video Clips

Clip #1    Clip #2    Clip #3

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Top 10 Hottest Porn Stars #3

Top 10’s Hottest Porn Stars #4  Nikki Benz

Nikki catches her coworker looking at a lesbian porno magazine. She finds it gross and they begin to argue when their boss Lexi overhears them. Lexi finds the magazine sexy and will stop at nothing to have Nikki’s tongue all over her horny wet pussy. At first Nikki resists but everyone knows the bos … Watch video!

Nikki Benz Video Clips

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Help, My Mom Is A Cougar!: 3 Tips On How To Keep Your Relationship With Her

Demi & Ashton

I have seen the future and it is filled with older women and younger men.

There is such a double standard out there.  Men can get as old and wrinkled as they wanna be and they can get a young women.  NO one says a word.

Now, we have uncovered the opposite and it’s all the talk.  It’s the cougar and she ready to pounce.

I don’t have a problem with that, as long as it’s someone elses’ mom.  But, when it’s my mom…sheesh!

There are those out there, like myself, who are adult children.  We may be blessed enough to still have our moms around and while our moms are letting loose as they get older, we seem to be taking on the more “responsible” and “reserved” role of daughter or son.   We are probably all the things our parents could ever wish for.

We take care of our lives and stay out of trouble.  We got to work and use coupons when we grocery shop, like mom taught us.

We wash behind out ears,  say “please” and “thank you” and feed the dog, like mom taught us.

We have made it this far with our mothers loving discipline and watchful eye.  We may have even had meddling mothers who wanted to “fix” the entire world for us.  Then, something happened.

Whether it was divorce, by death or another reason,  mom is single again.  Single and on the prowl.  But, she’s not looking for they guy with the salt and pepper hair that’s around her age.

She’s looking for that hot, young guy with the six-pack and firm beach body.

What the hell happened to our mom?

Where does that leave you and I?  We are sitting there like sticks-in-the-mud, with this scenario running in our minds.  Mom is lusting after young guys. WTF?

And our nice little responsible ways have put us on guard.

Hey mom, we got to that “we know better now” phase, but mom has reverted back to 15 or 16 yrs-old that we have to keep and eye on, know where she is at all times and makes sure she “Doesn’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”

Here we are.  How do we cope with this “teen-aged” mom of ours?  Her partying, dating and…wait.  Sex.  She might have sex with this guy.

Alright!  I have had it.  Here’s 3 ways I have learned to cope with this “Cougar” mom of mine.

Support You Local Mom:    If she asks for your opinion about her new guy, find something “polite” to say about him.  Yeah, you may not like her new guy, but support her.   

If you notice something about him that seems a little strange or that find awkward about him,  find a time when you are casually talking to bring this up.

Don’t become an overbearing “parent” of a daughter or son.     Be there to listen to her tales about her dates and whatnot about the new boyfriend.  If you can’t handle hearing about her s-e-x life, then kindly let her know that her sex life is TMI for you.  Remember when you used to rant or rave about the hot dates you had?

Remind Her Of  What She Taught You: Yep,  I remember all the nights my mom couldn’t understand why I wanted to stay out all night with my boyfriends even after high school.  Now I understand why!  It’s friggin’ dangerous out there.  Take some time to look back at all the no-no’s you had as a teen.  As pissy as I could get about them, I understand…now.  So, I bring all of it right back up ad throw it right back at my mom.  With love, of course.  And, yes…I support her this way.

• She may need to be reminded of being careful when she is out on a date.
• She needs to be reminded to call when she comes home.
• She needs to be reminded that she needs to keep her cell phone on in case of an emergency.
• She needs to wear clothing that is sexy, not slutty.
• Don’t wear too much makeup and look like a clown.

Yes, mom…You taught me well.

Mom, It’s Me Or Him, Not Me And Him!: Don’t make your mother choose bewteen you  or her new guy.  Keep your judgements out of the convo.  Don’t give her hell about this guy.  If she is having a safe time (emotionally and physically) then she is doing fine.    If mom is happy, the world is happy.  She is probably already feeling the pressure of being older and has the desire to have her relationships bewteen you and her new guy to become cohesive.  Your mom may talk a good game, but she probably wants you to accept the new guy without being judged and she wants to love and be close to the both of you.  Mom is a big girl.  If she needs help, she’ll let you know in one way or another.

Namaste

Seriously

Courteney Cox!

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The Sexy Stud for Hire

This is the first posting in the new blog series “The Sexy Stud for Hire.” Read each posting that follows after this date to read the story in order. ~ Thanks, Delaynee Sinclair

It was late one night, and I was nestled in front of my computer getting ready to write my next sexual love story. I wished it were my own. I knew it could be, if only I’d take a chance. Just as I started to type, my manager telephoned me. .

            “Delaynee, someone has contacted me about writing a companion book to ‘The Goddess.’ I think you should go for it.”

            I bit my bottom lip, and powered off my computer.

            “I’m not sure if ‘The Goddess’ is ready for a companion. My books are best-sellers. A companion may drag them down.” 

            My manager tried to advise me, but I can be pretty stubborn.

            “You’ve cranked out three erotic books in as many years, and would it be so bad if you had a companion?” 

            I sat in the darkness licking my wounds.

            “Delaynee, I know you’ve remained strong since your break-up. You’ve pushed through your pain, and made your life successful without him. You should be happy about that, but maybe it’s time you created with someone else for awhile.”

            I cracked my window a little, letting the cool night air blow in. 

            “I’ll take it into consideration,” I whispered as I hung up the phone.

            I crawled under my covers, alone. I wanted to numb myself with sleep, but I was restless. I was afraid if I opened myself up, I’d become vulnerable again.

            If I write with someone else, they’ll want to do public relations stuff and I want to remain anonymous. That’s why I like my pen name.

            I was restless falling asleep. My mind was racing with thoughts of how I just wanted to blend in with my surroundings.

            I’m just the woman that owns the book/coffee shop.

            The summer night air blew across my skin. My eyes finally grew heavy and I fell asleep.

            The next day at work I was back in the stockroom. I overheard a man questioning one of my employees.

            Is he asking about my book?

            I could hear my employee tell him they were sold out, and they’d be restocked in a couple of days.

            I knew I had several cases upstairs in my apartment over the bookstore, but I couldn’t let my employee’s know that I was the writer.

            They’d laugh me out of business if they knew their boss was sucking cock on paper.

            I moved closer to the door and tried to get a glimpse of the man with the sexy voice.

            “I’d love to meet the woman who writes those books,” he said. “I’d get down on one knee, and propose marriage.” 

            “Is it about the sex?” The employee asked.

            “No, it’s, about the connection I feel to her words,” he said. “I feel like she’s written them just for me.” 

My curiosity got the best of me and I walked back into my store. I made my way around the shelving unit to get a better look at my secret admirer, but it was too late. He was leaving.

Nice ass.

            “Did you see that guy?” the young female employee questioned. “Wow!  Someone should tell that writer she has an admirer!” 

I froze in my tracks. 

            “Are you okay?”

            “I will be.”

            Days pass and I was closing up shop one evening. All of my employees had gone, and I wished that I had someone to talk to. 

I unclipped my hair, letting it fall down past my shoulders. I heard the bells on the door jingle, and turned around to see a handsome man standing before me. 

            “Is it too late?” 

            Good God.

            I was taken aback by his angelic face. His eyes are as brown as fudge, and his smile could light up the night sky. I felt myself blushing at my hesitation, but finally responded.

            “It’s never too late.” 

            I re-clipped my hair and a few pieces fell out of place, gently framing my face.

            “How about a tall cup of whatever your roast of the day is?”

I poured him his coffee.

“Do you mind if I just grab a book real quick?”

“Not at all,” I said. “Purchasing books at my store keeps me in business.”

I winked, he smiled.

Drip, drip, drip. My pussy is loving this guy.

He heads straight to the romance section and comes back to the counter with my book, “The Goddess.” 

It’s a good thing I restocked that.

            “Good choice,” I replied knowing my secret was safe. 

            “Would you like to join me for a cup of coffee”

            He asked while paying for his purchases.

            “Ya, sure, why not?”

            Holy shit this guy is so sexy.

            I poured myself an espresso and took a seat across from my extremely hot, late night customer

He took a drink of the warm soothing brew, and our eyes met.

            “My name is Gavin, and I am a mechanic/book critic.” 

            I raised my eyebrow.

            “I’m Delaynee, and I’m speechless.”

            He smiled at me and we laughed, breaking the tension.

            “I was working on someone’s car one day and she had the first book of this series in her seat,” he said. “I was curious and read it in two hours.”

I smiled.

“Did you charge her for the labor during those two hours?”

“No, but I thanked her.”

            “What is it that you like about the stories?” I asked. “I mean, you’re a guy, and these stories are meant for women.”

            “Well, love is a universal language,” he said. “So I wouldn’t think the stories would exclude men, but to try to answer your question, the author, it’s as though, she writes her hearts desires, letting the Goddess represent her. Her characters are so lifelike. I can feel their vulnerabilities. I just want to call them on the phone, and send them my love. You probably think I’m crazy…”

            His voice trailed off, and he blushed. 

            “No, I think it’s lovely that I’ve been able to evoke such emotion out of such a big, strong guy.”

            “I’ve?” he said, raising an eyebrow. “Don’t you mean A. Starling?”

            Holy shit. How could I have made such a stupid slip of the lip?

            “I am A. Starling, the woman who penned that book.” I said feeling a flush of relief run through my body as I continued. “I’ve always wanted someone to write something like that for me, but instead I’ve written them for others.”

            I think Gavin almost fell off his chair and was genuinely floored by my admission.

            “You wrote these books?” He said. “Your husband is a lucky man.” 

            “Oh, I’m alone.”

            His eyes lit up.

             “Go out with me, tomorrow night,” he said. “I’ll pick you up here and…” 

            “I am not ready to date.” 

            I lowered my eyes hoping he couldn’t see the sorrow I was hiding.

            “Then I’ll be here for you, until you are.” 

            I raised my eyes as I sipped my coffee. I couldn’t help but stare at his determined face, and bulging biceps.

            Shit, I am screwed. I think he means it.

 

To be continued…

[Via http://tangledembrace.wordpress.com]

Howdy All You Naughty Phonesex Boys!

Now you boys out there that want some hot BBW fun with this Texan girl then I am ready to bring it on. I love being extremely naughty and love to roleplay with you to. I have no taboos and of course anything goes with me. I have plenty of years of experience and also I am a TRUE BBW MILF. I am engaged to a hot young stud who just barely turned 21 and sure knows how to make Mommy here happy. I would love to share my experience with you or maybe even show you a few thing or two. I may be a big woman but that just means more love to offer and more cushion for the pushin. Don’t be afraid to contact me if you have any questions. I will be doing a video blog at least once a week and if you are lucky you may end up having me talk about our call on my next video blog, now wouldn’t you feel special if I did.

Don’t forget now I do have those naughty pictures to offer but you must do that 30min call or more with me if you want a naughty picture sent to you darlings.

So if you think you can handle a sweet Texan BBW MILF and like to have a little fun tonight give me a call baby.

BBW Denise

888 8 FREAKY (888 837 3259) Ask for Denise

www.freakyfetishphonesex.com/denise

[Via http://bbwdenise.wordpress.com]

Goodbye bad boy, hello stud!

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Sexy, hot erotic stories that will make your pussy cream, and your cock hard.

“The New York City Bad Boy” is an erotic ROMANCE novella blog, and slowly builds the sexual tension. You must start at “The New York City Bad Boy” posting at the beginning of this blog – August 13, 2009 – and read every day after to read it in order. If you want short, steamy erotic stories that get straight to the sex, check out “Cougar Stories” by Romance Columnist Kate Mercer on the RSS Feed

[Via http://tangledembrace.wordpress.com]

7/09/2009

Just to flag up for you, I set myself a couple of weird targets which have skewed this batch. One was to write jokes about tea, purely because I had a cup of tea sitting in front of me. The other was to write gags about Wales. My initial plan was to write gags about all the home nations, but I got bored after Wales and gave up.

Anyway.

Michael Jackson was buried in a gold casket with a crown on the top. I knew bankrupt people got buried in “paupers graves”, I just never realised that’s what they looked like.

500 Scottish jobs lost at contact lens plant. Maybe if they get on their hands & knees they’ll manage to find them again?

Keanu Reeves was in Dundee last week. Rivalling Scott’s ship ‘The Discovery’ as the most famous wooden sight in the city.

George Burley had to give up instilling a siege mentality in the Scotland squad when they locked him in his room & tried to starve him.

Do chocolate bar names contribute to women’s negative body image issues? It must be difficult to feel slim after eating a whole Galaxy.

I let a conman convince me I was a receptacle for hot beverages. I felt like a mug.

Girlfriend suggested we try teabagging. The doctors say the scalding to her face will soon heal.

I managed to capture one of the X-Men in my cuppa. Storm in a teacup.

Apparently Nigella Lawson, Alan Sugar, & his son were all caught in a 3some. Milf & Two Sugars. [Tea gags getting increasingly contrived]

Welsh anthem is “Land of my Fathers”. Clearly a country where mums are allowed to hedge their bets when talking to kids about their dads.

[doesn't work written] Once when I took a leek I was charged with treason. I was in Wales though.

These C-Diff infections…how did they get the name? Was the first victim a rapper from Cardiff?

Catherine Zeta Jones is often associated with the Mumbles. As people call her father-in-law since the stroke.

A lot of criminals have found comfort in Church. Though that all stopped when she met Gavin.

News of the World say Kerry Katona thinks her hubby filmed her snorting coke and is furious with him. I thought filming the wife shoving stuff into her body was how couples kept the magic alive?

I was touching my estranged girlfriend’s vagina today. True what they say. Fun to play with an ex box.

Told my girlfriend I like taking the subway. She bound me, gagged me, then dildoed my arse. If only she’d realised subway was one word.

When I was young, I was a victim of rape. I had hayfever and we lived next to a field full of it.

I was embarrassed to admit i’d misplaced one of my A-Team action figures. Nobody likes to lose Face.

‘Thought for the day’ – shouldn’t we be encouraging people to have more than one?

I used to be a professional draughts player. I’ve had a checkered past.

SHIT! I was trying to write one of those poison pen letters but I’ve just jabbed myself with the pen and now I’m going to die!

Apparently Paul Daniels only drinks those cans of draught lager that have a Wizbit in them.

A study’s found women are more afraid of spiders than men are. Until they get over that, they’re never going to play top-level snooker.

Australians enjoy mineral water filtered through Aberdonian stone. They just love Pommie Granite juice.

I was a keen amateur golfer until I turned pro. And began sucking cocks to buy crack.

Jade’s mum wants Jack Tweed to give Jade’s ring back. He should probably keep it. He might be needing a spare ring after a while on remand.

The Moors murderers – should that be classed as racially aggravated crime? And how did they time-travel back to Medieval Spain?

You can see me gigging at The Shed in Shawlands, Glasgow on Thursday, September 17th or at The Abbey in Kirkcaldy on September 26th.

You can also hear me in the ‘Five Things’ feature on MacAulay&Co on BBC Radio Scotland on Friday, September 18th. (11.05-11.30am)

Teddy x

[Via http://comedyteddy.wordpress.com]